Dating and Relationship Advice During Coronavirus

We all thrive on connection, conversation, and touch. For single people, especially those who live alone, this can be quite challenging during the pandemic. Meeting someone organically in your neighborhood while taking a walk  or grocery shopping isn’t likely to happen, especially since everyone is wearing a mask and you can’t even see a smile. Since people are not gathering for parties in homes, the option of meeting at a party is it going to happen either. This leaves Internet and app dating.

Getting to know someone new requires motivation and time to read through profiles, text, talk, and have facetime/skype/zoom conversations. Many of my clients say they have limited time and energy required for profile viewing, initial contact ,and long conversations with strangers. Just keeping up with the people you already know and love takes more energy and conscious effort now.

So does it even make sense to meet new people online and date right now? If you want to have some fun with another amazing single person who is available, then yes. If you want to meet your life partner, then yes. If you want to meet a special new friend, then yes. If you want to meet a Covid safe sex partner, then yes. If you want to have interesting conversations with a person who understands the quiet life of being single, then yes.

Dating during the pandemic is actually much easier than you might imagine. In many ways, it’s not that different from ordinary internet dating, until you factor in physical contact. You begin just like you always do by using your favorite internet  site or app and reach out to people who interest you. Once you are texting or emailing, then move to video conversations. Spend time talking and getting to know this person before deciding to meet.

You can have a virtual coffee or drink together, and many people are enjoying virtual dating before meeting. It gives you time to slowly connect with no added pressures.

Take your time flirting and getting to know each other before meeting in person. Since you don’t know this other person, you don’t know how  honest, open, careful or risky they have been during the coronavirus. You will need to find out who they socialize with, where they go, how often they wear a mask, and you know the other questions to ask to protect your health. These are the same important conversations you have with friends and family. You need to find out who you are both having contact with, how often, and how safe  you believe these contacts are being.

As you get to know each other, you can better assess your level of trust and honesty. This is foundational for any relationship, so you get to practice  having these conversations before you meet. Pay careful to what your gut, your intuition, or your inner knowing tells you about this person and trust your sense of whether they are honest. You are in charge of making safe decisions about your health and well-being, and  gathering information is crucial to decision making.

If your conversations are going well virtually, then make a plan to meet in person. You know  to socially distance and wear masks so meet in a park, go on a walk or hike, and bring a picnic, tea, coffee or wine and  get to know each other. You probably won’t go to restaurants since you sit two or so feet across from each other, but you can do  most anything outdoors where you can distance and wear masks. If you are meeting and dating in the San Francisco Bay Area, you have hundreds of trails, beaches, parks, and amazing places outdoors to meet.

Trust yourself most of all to make smart and healthy choices about people you date and  spend time with. There is no need to put your love life on hold during the pandemic.  So start visiting  new dating apps and sites and enjoy meeting a new friend or partner.